If Wu-Tang Members Were NBA Players

Ever wondered what Wu-Tang Clan members would look like as NBA players? In this post, we’ll imagine various Wu clansmen as NBA ballers. Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you the starting lineup. (Warning: Please wait for the gifs to load to experience the full transformation.)

Raekwon as Baron Davis (PG)
Every team needs a playmaker who not only talks the good talk but also walks the walk. Rae and BD share that common trait of putting their mouth where their money is. Rae is arguably Wu-Tang’s most vocal member; Baron supplements his 17 Points and 7 Assists per game average with a healthy dose of vocal leadership.

ODB as Allen Iverson (G)
AI and ODB have more than their 6’0″ height and knack for acronyms in common. Both men share a resentment for conformity. Dirty tossed conventional rhyming out the window but still showcased a raw, innovative approach to emceeing. And who needs team practice to become one of the game’s greatest players? AI’s 27.7 points per game average is third all-time behind MJ and Wilt Chamberlain.

GZA as Dr. J (SF)
Just as Dr. J revolutionized basketball with flashy dunks and smart baseline moves, GZA/Genius helped propel East-Coast hip-hop with his cerebral rhymes and compelling stories. Both men are blessed with an outstanding sense of imagination that earned them the respect of peers.

Ghostface as Karl Malone (PF)
If Ghostface Killah’s menacing rhymes were basketball moves they would resemble Karl Malone’s flying elbows. Dangerous play aside, Malone was nicknamed The Mailman because he of his consistency — he always delivered. Can you think of a more consistent MC than Ghostface Killah?

Method Man as Shaquille O’Neal (C)
One of them is a veteran MC, the other should never be allowed near a mic except for the sole purpose of saying “Tell me how my ass taste.” And when it comes to individual accomplishment, no one knows it better than these two — Shaq as a 1st overall pick who went on to win 3 NBA Finals MVP and Meth as Wu’s first solo star with 3 Platinum-certified albums under his belt.

RZA as Phil Jackson (Coach)
Every great team needs a visionary leader steering them wisely to the path of success. Just as Phil Jackson’s triangle offense has been winning championships since the 90s, RZA’s unparalleled production has served as a template for Wu’s success since 1993. Though separated by 24 years, they both share an appreciation for meditation. And just like the teams they lead, Phil and RZA are motivated by an insatiable appetite for success.

Wu-Tang Clan Ain’t Nuthing ta F’ Wit
It’s been 15 years since Wu-Tang entered the chambers, yet their success recipe remains inimitable. And despite their individual victories, the sum of Wu-Tang Clan is still greater than its parts.

Animation by the incomparable Ivan Rott of Hip-Hop Is Read

Rizoh

Rizoh is the most powerful man in all the lands. He lives in Houston where he earned a BS in Nerf Herding. He's the founder of The Rap Up, the editor of Roc4Life.com, and is in the Grammy-awaiting band Pervertable Disciples.

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