I have mixed feelings about charity singles. On one hand, I understand it’s usually for a good cause, blah, blah, blah. On the other, I can’t help but notice that many of these songs suck ass cheeks. Here to inflict further assault on our ears is Simon Cowell and his friends. For the collaborative charity single “Everybody Hurts” Simon called up Leona Lewis, Susan Boyle, Miley Cyrus, Mariah Carey, James Blunt, Kylie Minogue, and Jon Bon Jovi, the dudes from Take That, Mika, Rod Stewart, James Morrison, James Morrison, JLS, Alexandra Burke . He even dragged Westlife out of their grave. Now please stop being an overly critical asshole and donate to the cause. You’ll even get a bland, sappy single in return.
My apologies to R.E.M.
