John Legend’s Hairline Responds to M.I.A. Rumors

Written by Rizoh. Posted in Ya Heard?!?!

Published on June 29, 2010 with No Comments

John Legend received an award for his humanitarian efforts at the 2010 BET Awards, but BET might as well have given the honor to his hairline because that’s what dominated conversation the next day. Legend’s hairline, which was visibly absent from his head on Sunday night, sparked an outrage in the Twitterverse as #johnlegendshairline quickly became a trending topic.

Today, the infamous hairline finally responded to allegations that it has permanently severed ties with the R&B superstar. “I’ve been away on vacation ever since John was 5,” said Legend’s hairline via a press statement. “I can’t believe some people are obsessing about me now. John has been famous for 6 years.”

“To the haters,” Legend’s hairline continued, “John is still smarter, more talented, more successful and better looking than your sister. So fall back.”



Rizoh is the most powerful man in all the lands. He lives in Houston where he earned a BS in Nerf Herding. He's the founder of The Rap Up, the former editor of, and is in the Grammy-awaiting band Pervertable Disciples.

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