Adam Scott loved Piranha 3-D so much that he tweeted the following guarantee:
“Seriously. If you feel ripped off I will come to your house and act out my scenes for you and your friends. U provide shotgun and fish.”
Scott had a change of heart the next day. He probably realized that he’s about to get a kabillion messages from people who will claim that Piranha 3-D sucked just to make his life miserable. So, he offered this clarification to Vanity Fair.
“I really don’t think it will be necessary, since I can’t imagine one not being satisfied with Piranha 3-D, but just in case, yes of course I will be there. Few things: Will need the aforementioned firearm and fish. Will also need local Elisabeth Shue look-alike to run dialogue with, a plaid shirt, two high-fives (one before we run the scenes, one after), peanut M&M’s, a map with the closest Red Roof Inn circled on it (I won’t be staying there, I just like knowing where it is. I’ll be staying with you), a 700-word essay on why you neglected to recognize that Piranha 3-D totally fucking shreds, Perrier, a quick guitar lesson, one grenade, dinner with your family, and directions to the airport.”
I swore off movies for the rest of the year, but I might actually go see Piranha 3-D.