Welcome to the second installment of TRU’s new monthly feature ‘Lyrics of Fury,’ where we take an in-depth look at what we deem to be the best verse of the past moment. Yeah, we’re mad late with this one as we’re already more than two weeks separated from last February, despite that month being even a day longer. But we had some issues, as you may remember, and this song dropped only a couple days into March, right? So eff it, this track deserves the spot.
The problem with dissecting a track like this is that there’s so very little to dissect. There’s a lot to mull over and appreciate, but how much can you say about a track that’s this honest and direct about it’s topic? So the amount of annotations is a lot smaller than last time, but the straightforwardness of this verse only add to it’s strength. The story seems ripped straight from KRIT’s gut and it’s heartwrenching honesty is the driving force behind the it. There’s an intensely personal tale at play here, but by choosing not to mention any specific examples and stick to the the emotional impact and relationship dynamics at work, it’s universally relatable at the same time. This song is the perfect example of an intricate hip-hop love song without cheap sentimental pandering. Don’t mistake this for trendy emo-posturing and certainly not for softness, this kind of brutal honesty is as real as it gets.
I’m like what happened to us, maybe I’m rapping too much
I been missing your touch, sometimes I’m out and I lust
What if love ain’t enough, and all we have is this trust
What if I’m fucking that up, so you don’t trust in me much
I’m wasting your time, to say I’m straight, I’d be lying
It’s either you or this music but I can’t make up my mind1
I’d throw you a line, I’d give you a sign
Right now I’m through with the trying, I think you ready to fly
I settle for less so when I’m tired of stress
I go through with the motions pretending I’m at my best2
Fall victim to flesh, I live to be fresh
But this ain’t what I expect because my life is a wreck
I run out of breath cause I ain’t taking the steps
Money comes and it goes ’til family’s all I got left
I’m seeing my growth, but I’m still from myself
You’ll be hollering out next because you’re ready to fly
I can’t find the words so you’ll just fill in the blanks
I’m doing the norm and not what it takes
I’ll keep folding my cards and you’ll keep raising the stakes3
‘Til we forget about us and what we have is too late
I know in your heart, you ain’t conditioned to race
So I steady the wheel, forever pumping the brakes4
Resort to the bottle, that’s how I deal with the shakes
Pray for these haters, that’s how I deal with the hate
Look to the sky, don’t be content with the now
You ain’t concerned with the why, you just wanna know how
I didn’t give her the chance, when you just wanna be down
And save me from myself, but I’m wanting to drown
King is much more than the weight of a crown
As good as it feels, that ain’t the way that it sounds
Being single is cool ’til ain’t nobody around
Then I’m chasing you down, cause you was ready to fly
I can’t be what you want me to be
You’re shooting too high cause you ain’t aiming at me
One minute you’re calling out for the D5
Then the next minute you wanna be free
Then the next minute you hollering out peace
Although I know it’s a war and there’ll be blood in the street6
If you call don’t be frustrated at me
Just leave you’re heart at the beep, cause mine is harder to reach
Cause mine is harder to see
And that don’t make it harder to cheat
Being friends would make it harder to breathe
So if you ready to fly, just forget about me7
But if you willing to try then I’m willing to leap
Out of the window of pain and fall in love at your feet
I ain’t the man you want me to be
I guess that’s what’s been bothering me8
1. The admission of guilt and the self-examination that comes along with it are the core of the song. These opening lines make clear right off the bat that this isn’t as simple as a lover’s quarrel, it’s more a case of conflicting personalities and priorities. KRIT loves her enough to want to make her a priority, but he’s not at that point in his life yet.
2. He wishes better on her and knows he doesn’t give her what she deserves right now, pretending he does keeps him from losing her but what he does he can’t hide from himself.
3. A solid metaphor never hurts a verse and adds a poetic flourish to the song
4. See 3.
5. …he’s not talking about Detroit.
6. Solid play on words, regarding her closing the conversation with ‘peace’ while he knows things are about to get as bad as they can get.
7. The friend zone is no option because he can’t put away his feelings despite being unable to give her what she needs. It’d be easier to loose her altogether then.
8. Full circle (see 1). He knows the problem, he knows how to deal with it, but no matter his feelings, he can’t. As hard to deal with as it is to admit.
Lyrics of Fury: Nas on ‘Triple Beam Dreams’