Capitalism and Kafka meet at Dukes’ florist, while he laments ever asking for a plant instead of more Cuban rum.
Dukes is done with pussy-footing around and demands some straight-up hardcore Tokkie-rap. What the hell that is? Let him explain, in typically inimitable Dukes-fashion.
He lost some weight and gained some hate. All in all, 2013 wasn’t bad according to Dukes. Read on to find out how Russian bad guys, digging for soul records and cheap beer made his year.
If you’re a regular TRUbian, you’re probably well aware of the fact TRU’s contributors live all over the map. While we originated in Houston as Rizoh’s brainchild, managing editor Jaap van der Doelen lives in…
Fed up with living in WASP-city, Duke gleefully announces stepping down a rung on society’s ladder as he anticipates his imminent return to the hood.
In which Aaron breathes a sigh of relief and learns about the wrath of old heads while bumping UGK.
A large swath of Aaron’s Back To The Classics series did not sit well with him, and his irreverent takedowns of albums revered by many of us old heads (to be fair, we did ask…
Dukes reminisces on the dues he had to pay, plowing through ‘thank you’ lists of albums for clues, and lambasts the streaming media generation as too lazy to support their local record store and too pussy to download illegally.
While consuming copious amounts of Polish pilsner beer, Dukes concluded that the phrase “You just hatin’” will lead to the downfall of society. There’s still time to stop it though, if you don’t whine like a lil’ bitch.
After years of cropped thuggery, Dukes decides he needs a decent haircut to move on up like Curtis. The struggle to find one where he doesn’t have to hear about Justin Bieber, ovarian cancer, or the life of a teen mom is a serious one.